03 December 2007

Monday News Feed

-Larry Craig, the gift that keeps on giving, has been accused by eight other men of engaging in dirty deeds with them (sex!). Before I even got to make the joke, it turns out that one of these men was Mike Jones, the same male escort that the Rev. Ted Haggard was busted for, and yes, they did have sex in a men's room. This is what I call reality stealing my material.

-Gillian Gibbons was pardoned by the president of the Sudan for naming a teddy bear Mohammad. She will be heading home today, according to the press, missing out on all of the fun fatwas and riots. Interesting side note- according to her MySpace page she is a Leonard Cohen fan, so she's cool in my book.

-Sound familiar? A new report released today shows that Iran halted their attempts at making nuclear weapons back in 2003. Hmmm....accusing a country of seeking weapons of mass destruction, and then it turns out we were misled by the administration. So...in what way is this not like Sadaam and the WMDs?

7 comments:

Grant Miller said...

Congratulations on your Drysdale Award nomination.

pistols at dawn said...

Iran is at least one letter different from Iraq.

Suze said...

Honestly, what the hell does L. Craig do in the bathrooms? Tapdance?

The Guv'ner said...

I have named my computers "Mohammad 1" and "Mohammad 2" in honor of that lady. Mohammad 2 just goes by Mo. If I was going to be really mean and trashy about it I'd spell it MOEHAHMMYD (like those people who make up names like Macynzye and Madysyn) but I feel that might be tasteless.

thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy said...

Someone should totally hook Larry Craig up with that red-haired guy from American Idol.

Leonesse said...

Progress, he says he is innocent. Why can't you believe the man? Why? He IS a Republican and that is just right up there with GOD himself. It doesn't matter what he does it only matters what he says he does or doesn't do.

Is he gonna hold up the peace sign and say he is NOT a gay?

Justin said...

Oh my god you people! Larry Craig is getting such a bad rap! It's obvious from the photo that he simply dropped his bionic hand on accident whilst using the restroom, and that so-called undercover cop interpreted it as someone trolling for filthy, disgusting, immoral, lurid homosexual sex. He's a Republican for christsake! He doesn't even have sex!