JonLovitz: Hero For Our Times

Andy Dick irritates me. For every time I've laughed at something he did in a crappy movie or TV show, there are probably 100 times I didn't. But I'm not the only one who doesn't like him. Jon Lovitz really doesn't like him.

The short version: Dick is a dick, and Lovitz either 'pushed him really hard' or 'smashed his head into the bar.' I sincerely hope it was the latter.

The longer version. Jon Lovitz and Phil Hartman were good friends. At a party in 1997, Andy Dick was doing coke, and gave some to Hartman's wife, Brynn, who had been sober for a decade. Six months later Brynn had spiraled downwards into depression and drugs. It ended when she killed herself and Hartman. I'm not saying this was entirely Dick's fault, but Lovitz has always blamed him for what happened.

To quote Lovitz in Page Six of the New York Post, "Last year, Lovitz related, a drunken Dick strolled up to his table at Ago in West Hollywood, rudely downed his guests' peach liqueur drinks, and "looked at me and said, 'I put the "Phil Hartman hex" on you - you're the next one to die.' I said, 'What did you say?' and he repeated it. I wanted to punch his face in, but I don't hit women."

When the two ran into each other at the Laugh Factory last Wednesday, "I wanted him to say he was sorry for the 'Phil Hartman hex,' " Lovitz told us. "First he says, 'I don't remember saying that.' Then he leans in and says, 'You know why I said it? Because you said I killed Phil Hartman.' Which I never said. Then he asked me to be in his new movie.

"I grabbed him by the shirt and leaned him over and said, 'I don't want to be in your movie! I don't want to be in your life!' I pushed him against the rail. Then I pushed him again really hard. A security guard broke it up. I'm not proud of it . . . but he's a disgusting human being."

Jamie Masada, who owns the Laugh Factory, told Page Six, "Jon picked Andy up by the head and smashed him into the bar four or five times, and blood started pouring out of his nose."

Lovitz told Page Six, "All the comedians are glad I did it because this guy is an asshole."